Set Backs

I suppose set backs are all a part of going after a dream and it's how you deal with them that counts. This is my fault anyway so I just need to deal with it.

My right elbow has been a little sorer than normal recently, and I thought that was just due to all the increased usage, which is was, but I was thinking more of it just being sore and it would get better with time. Today when I was at the park with C-bob, on my second to last hit, when I made contact with the ball, pain ripped through my arm. I told C-bob I was fine, but I really should have said no and stopped. I'm so committed to getting this hitting down that I actually injured myself. From what I have read, it sounds like I have "golfer's elbow", which is similar to "tennis elbow" only it's on the inside of the elbow. Basically, right now I'm pretty drugged up and not feeling too bad. The biggest problem comes with trying to pull anything that has a small amount of resistance, such as a locked door knob or shower knob. If I pull on something with resistance like that, pain shoots from the elbow and up the arm. This causes the whole arm to hurt. Plus there is bruising on the top of my hand, that I do not know if is related.

Anyway, this means it's time to RICE my elbow and take a break from hitting until it heals and figure out what I'm doing wrong to cause the injury in the first place. I think I will have to postpone my next hitting lessons until the arm is in better shape. I'm not happy about this, but there isn't much else I can do. If I don't stop now, it will only get worse. I'm going to talk to my instructor, probably Monday, and tell him what's going on. I may need to invest in some kind of elbow band/brace thing to use when I'm hitting, once this injury has healed. I can still work on my cardio training, like running sprints and such, and I always have my mental game. Sometimes you just have to listen to your body and take it easy. I will be back there hitting as soon as possible, I know that for a fact.

Tired

I was going to do an update, but then I got to blogger and realized that I was tired and I have places to be tomorrow. So I guess I will do a better update later.

I had my second hitting lesson Thursday and it went really well. I took in my new notebook and he seemed impressed by it. I have some new things to work on, mainly getting my swing into better shape. My muscles are sore a lot now but I'm not going to let that stop me from practicing and what not. It's just an added benefit of making my body work for me. I'm sure in a year, I'm going to look back here and be very happy with where I am.

UNL sent me a thing in the mail today about that job I applied for. It was basically this return card for EOE stuff and a list of the benefits. It let me know that they had my resume and all that fun stuff. I hope they are planning on hiring soon, I'd like to get interviewed and get to work. I'm going to get this job.

I have another new philosophy, it's not really new but I put it this way: "Control the things you can control and let the rest go." I'm going to see how that works for me.

I'm going to go sleep now though, so night all!

From My Mind

I took a bit from the blog below and created this quote for myself.

"I know there were things in the past that I wanted to do, that don't seem as important now. Life is just like that though, full of changes. It's not a failure but rather a clearer vision of who I am and where I want to be."

I like it. It sounds good.

Contemplations

I have been thinking a lot more lately about the direction of my life and the goals I want to set. As I think about things, the more my mind comes to rest on this question, "Do I actually enjoy writing?" I always lie to myself, saying that I really do enjoy it. But if I enjoyed it so much, wouldn't I be doing it more? It's as if my mind knows that I'm lying so it keeps brining the subject up. This whole thing was an experiment to begin with anyway, and not all experiments go the way we want, but as long as we learn something, that's a success. I have learned that I need a job to feel fulfilled with my days. I have learned that while I may seem talented as a writer, if I'm not happy doing it, then it's really not going to work as a career.

I'm not saying that I'm giving up on writing entirely, it's just that I want to reclaim it as a hobby, not a lifestyle. I still very much want to write my book, and I plan on doing that, but on my own time. I want to feel ready to write when I go to write it. Life is full of choices and you just have to make the ones that you believe fully in. I still want to become published, but now is not the right time in my life for that. I need to get out in the world more, live more, have more experiences to work with. Then I can come back and write about it all.

I do have a new goal though, for the future. I want to become either a life coach or a sports psychologist. Having a job at UNL will be helpful because I can take a couple classes a semester for just the cost of fees. This means I can take some psychology classes and work on getting that goal done. I have an idea in my mind how this will all come together. The plan, right now, is to make the changes in my life that I am working on right now. This could take me over 2 years, but I'm prepared to wait that long. Once I have my life in line, then I can worry about helping others. I don't think this is selfish, but I need to really focus on me for awhile. I need to change the things in my life I can control and let the other things go. I plan on keeping track of the ups and downs of my life-rebuilding and then write a book about it. I'd like to get my psychology degree too, something I've thought about doing for years.

So as the days go on, my goals and life change. I know that there are things I wanted to do that I've blogged here before that don't seem important now. Life is just like that though, full of changes. It's not a failure but rather a clearer vision of where I want to be.

The thing I am working on hardest right now is turning my negative thoughts into positive. For example, instead of "I don't know how to slide," I now think: "I need to learn how to slide." The meaning is basically the same but the feeling is a bit different. It's really a tough process because you have to first realize your negative thoughts and then work hard to change to the positive. Every time you have a negative thought, you have to stop, turn it over in your mind, and make it work out in a positive way. You have to live with you, so you might as well be nice to yourself.

Book Review!

I just finished reading "Mind Gym" by Gary Mack and David Casstevens and I highly recommend it. The book is mainly about the inner motivation that athletes need to succeed but I found the information to be universal in all of life's issues. It's main statement is that you have to believe in yourself, your dreams and set the goals needed to achieve that. It's really helping me a lot with turning my mind into positive thoughts and letting go of the negative. It also helped me a lot with my batting, which is always a plus. It's a quick read so if you need some motivation, check it out.

I have my next batting lesson tomorrow and I'm really excited. I know that I'm going to go in there, show what I've learned so far and learn a bunch more. I'm so eager to learn more things to work on. I know the lesson is going to go great so I can't wait. My body is a little miffed by all this new action, but with time, it'll be alright. For now, I simply ignore it and go on, careful not to go so far as to really hurt myself.

On one last note, I committed brownie murder in the microwave at my parent's house today. All is well, but seriously, frozen brownies in a microwave too long really get to smoking. I guess it was someone's way of reminding me to not eat the brownies. Also, breathing smoke is not an easy task. All is well though, no fire, so that's a plus. This shall be forever remembered as "The Brownie Incident"

Motivation

"Motivation is something nobody else can give you. Others can help motivate you, but basically it must come from you, and it must be a constant desire to do your very best at all times and under any circumstances." -Joe DiMaggio

Woot

I spent most of yesterday hanging out with Amber. We ate lunch at Subway and then did some shopping at ShopKo. I got a new shirt, some cool snoopy socks, this relaxing squeeze pillow, and a new dog toy for the Jessinator. After that we went back to her place and chatted, did job hunting and played with the internet. We downloaded these really scary hypnosis mp3s and listened to those. One of them was super creepy with a weird, scary voice on the background. We also talked a little about our writing and it makes me realize that I still have not been producing much writing. I need to work on that today for sure.

Amber's husband Jason (he's cool, he likes baseball) lent me his copy of Simpson's Hit and Run for Playstation 2. I played last night and know I have to own this game. I'm not sure what system I want to buy it for though, probably the first one that drops the price. I'm planning on going to play it some more in a little bit. I stopped last night when I got to a mission that I failed. The game is a lot of fun, you follow these missions to collect things or race people and you also pick up coins and get to kick stuff. Kicking stuff is a lot of fun, you even get to kick the people and run them over with cars. The mission I failed was using the Plow King truck to smash Mr. Smither's car before it gets to the Power Plant. Oh and when the cars get smashed up too much, they explode. You have to find these wrenches laying around to restore the vehicle if it's about the explode. I like Simpson's Road Rage, but I believe that I am enjoying Hit and Run even more.

Yesterday's hitting practice kept being delayed by weather. It started raining when I was at Amber's, and I didn't realize until later that it was actually a severe thunderstorm. When I left their place it wasn't raining, but by the time I got to my parent's house, it started storming again. So I sat in their house, watched some TV and ate some chili, waiting for the rain to stop. The storm finally blew over and I grabbed my tee and headed outside. So I'm standing in this rather empty backyard, yielding a giant stick of aluminum with lightning on both sides of me. It was far enough away that I wasn't worried, but I kept my eye on the sky anyway, just in case. My body is pretty sore now just from hitting practice, but that's why we have OTC pain killers, right? Going to get over there today and get in a good session of hitting.

Well, that's about all from Camp Gopher. Peace!

Post Hitting Lesson

So I went to my first hitting lesson today and it went really well over all. 30 minutes can go by really quickly when you are working hard on something, the lesson was over a lot faster than I thought it would be. I may have to debate going to hour session at some point.

He taught me a lot about how to do a proper stance and pointed out all the things I was doing wrong. It's going to be hard work to unlearn such bad habits, but that just means I need to practice more. My next lesson is at 7 on Thursday and I can't wait. I really hope to get a lot of good practice in prior to that so that it shows. One big problem I'm having is with rolling my wrist to early in my swing, something I didn't even know I was doing until he pointed it out. I'm still having problems bringing all the different mechanics into play at the same time, but I'm getting closer. I hit off my tee at my parent's for at least an hour tonight and I'm starting to get a feel for it. My body is tired but this is necessary to get better.

I think I'm going to go buy a small notebook tomorrow, so I can write down things from the lessons I want to remember, and also questions to ask at my next lesson. I already have one I want to ask, but I need to write it down so I don't forget.

That's about it from me. Peace!

Exhausted

I'm tired. Will blog later.